Musings: Homeopathy???

by Dai Howells

So, as of last week, the Government was considering Early Day Motion 1820, namely an enquiry into the funding of homeopathy and the potential to provide it on the NHS. Florida codes bank

The motion went a little something like this:
“This House welcomes the campaign by the Homeopathy Research Institute (HRI) to place homeopathy research on the national agenda as a credible scientific field of inquiry.”

A credible scientific field of recovery. Then, just when you think the tawdry shower of bullshit started and ended there, they pulled out this fountain of fuckwittery:
“In the UK, the practice of homeopathy has been part of the National Health Service (NHS) since its inception.”

Yes, of course. Now you come to mention it your doctors do advise that rubbing bark on your face would cure a headache and that a common cold was curable with a two- Zithromax pharmacya-day course of magic beans and a kiss from a fucking llama. Levitra generico

Before the idea was shot down (which, eventually, it was – hurrah), it had the support Wellbutrin SR Online of none other than Lib Dem MP for Portsmouth South and full-time controversy magnet Mike Hancock. Cheap Levitra online But then again, it counts for rhinocort little given that Hancock once placed at number two in the “signature whores” list of MPs who are ready and willing to back any old toss regardless of whether or not it has the gumption to stand on two legs. The reason for his exceedingly high placing being that in 2009, Hancock had signed 802 early day motions, as opposed to the house average of just 100.

But anyway, I digress. For those of you who are maybe not entirely sure as to what homeopathy is, please allow me a moment to explain. Buy antibiotics online without prescription. Online Drugstore. Levitra reviews

Imagine, if you will, that you have ten glasses of water. Order Doxycycline Into the first, you drop a solitary droplet of tree sap, or moonbeams, or happiness, take your pick. You then take a droplet from cup one and place it in cup two. Vardenafilo levitra Once you’ve done that, you take a droplet from cup two and place it in cup three, before repeating all the way up to cup ten.

Now, here is the point where science and homeopathy take two different paths. Science will Buy Female Viagra Online Pharmacy say that cup ten is, or may as well be, water. Even if each cup is 100ml and each droplet is 1ml, by the time you finish your decidedly pointless task, only 0.000000001% of the 100ml in cup ten will contain any trace of buy drugs online the original droplet. Whereas homeopathy, however, suggests that it contains just as much joy and goodness as the first cup. Why? Buy Propecia Online Pharmacy No Prescription Needed Because water has memory.

Yes, memory.

But if water has memory, how come it’s not remembering being in a salty sea, or being pissed out of someone else’s body? By the same token, you could drink this wonder potion, piss it back out again and drink it once more because it’s remembered the good stuff and forgotten the fact that for the last twenty minutes it’s been coursing around your insides.

This, I’m sure you’ll agree, is the kind of stuff that Disney wouldn’t even touch; the sort of abject bullshit farming that you could almost laugh at if it wasn’t taken so frighteningly serious. It is, of course, on a par with saying that Simba was real or that the Northern Lights aren’t in fact caused by solar winds and electromagnetism but instead by the earth telling us its feeling happy, or playful, or frisky like some multi-coloured celestial fucking mood ring.

Thankfully, however, after much pressure from science groups and rational human beings, the motion was thrown out and now our hysterically under-funded NHS can now get on with the real issues, like curing people by using something a little more exacting than hopes and fears.

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